April 14th, Honolulu: I wake up needing to urinate horribly, but I’m still so tired I just lie there for a while wondering if perhaps I can just fall back asleep for a while and let it be. I couldn’t fall asleep until somewhere around 4am last night, even though I tried to get to sleep at 2am. That just happens some nights, and it’s been like that for a long time. The best explanation as for why is that my brain won’t shut up, won’t stop bombarding me with thoughts and things to consider. I’ve found the best way to slow it down is to write, to put all my thoughts in a place where I know they’re permanent and can’t be forgotten but no longer need my attention. That or get high so I can’t think anymore. I wrote nearly 20 pages last night but I still ended up wasting over an hour staring at the ceiling before I gave up and went outside to read for a while.

After failing to fall back asleep I get up and make a dash for the bathroom. When I come out Cade and Kari inform me that the ‘shark people’ called on us to cancel again. Where it gets interesting is that they also said that we have to show up for the 11am trip and naturally Kari refused because it was way too early. The ‘shark people’ said that if we didn’t show they’d charge the credit card anyway, and Kari told them that if they did she’d contact the Hawaii business bureau and start some action against them. They gave up after that and everyone went back to sleep. I decide that’d be a good idea too and return to the bedroom, and although I lie there for a good 45 minutes again fail to fall asleep.

When I get up properly Cade and I decide to go to Makapu beach, where I’m sure not to get injured because there are no rocks at the bottom. Kari’s not feeling well so she elects to stay behind, so we change into our swim wear and head out.

Makapu is about a 20 minute drive outside the center of Honolulu, but the waves and sea floor conditions are vastly superior to those of Waikiki. However, it seems like the beach is really only known amongst locals, and on most visits there’s rarely more than a couple dozen people hanging around, plus the spattering of hardcore surfers. The waves aren’t barreling very much today but they are pretty large, and after lying around in the sun we hit the water.

I’m not a stellar swimmer but not totally useless at it either. My biggest problem with swimming in the ocean is that my eye’s tolerance for salt water is basically zero, and if I get any in there I’m temporary blinded and I can’t open them very well. Because of this, I normally stay fairly shallow and just jump over waves instead of duck diving under them, as Cade tells me I should do.

For a while things are ordinary and Cade and I swim around slamming into waves and acting like general morons in the water like we normally do. Then rather suddenly I find myself surprisingly far out and a moment later Cade is yelling at me to dive under the next large wave. I decide to try and go over instead, and it slams me under and takes me for a spin. I come up blinded and the next wave hits me instantly, sending me back under again. I come up struggling for breath and open my eyes just in time to see another wave slam into me, knocking the air out of my lungs completely. I try to concentrate on pushing up towards the top and when I break the surface I try to take a huge breath in, with mixed success. I look at the wave in front of me through my stinging eyes and start swimming as hard as I can towards the beach as it slams into me again and knocks me under. By this point I’m nearly totally out of air and the thought “I wonder what the odds of my drowning are?” crosses my mind as I feel the pressure tighten in my airless lungs. I somehow make it back to the top and see that Cade has found his way near me
“I need out of here now Cade!” I yell at him and grab for his shoulder.
Another wave crashes into us and puts me under again as I swim as hard as I can towards the beach. I manage to find my way to the surface again and I hear Cade say
“You’re good, I got ya here.”
Luckily the next wave that comes in is much smaller and I manage to swim it much further in towards the beach as I grasp on to Cade to make sure the current doesn’t sweep me back out. The next wave is even smaller and I make it back towards an area of the beach where I am basically walking out. I am gasping for air 100 times harder than at the end of our three mile run last night, and I get to the edge of the beach and then plop down in the sand and try to catch my breath. Cade joins me a moment later
“I told you to duck dive” he says
“Lesson learned” I retort. Oh well, I like to live dangerously, a statement I back up by staying out of the water for the rest of the day. I spend the remainder of my at the beach on my towel trying to get a tan.

In the evening Cade, Kari and I go to dinner at a Vietnamese place. The discussion of my swimming incident comes up, and I tell Cade I’d guess there was a roughly 5% chance of my drowning. He says he thinks it was closer to 15. I think he’s probably over estimating, but either way I’d say I’m running pretty good on my trip so far. Christ, I would look so retarded if I got myself killed on day eight of a 150 day trip.

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