In 1986, Dan Harrison ( see picture above ) was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University.

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Dan approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant's foot and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Dan worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Dan stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away.

Dan never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.


Twenty years later, Dan was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenage son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Dan and his son Dan Jr. were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Dan , lifted its front foot off the ground, and then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Dan couldn't help wondering if this was the same elephant. He summoned up his courage, looked to see if any guards were around and then climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder.

The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Dan's legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

haha.... got this off another board. Hope you got a chuckle...

2Slick

I've been a dedicated micro-donk mtt on-line poker grinder since roughly the turn of the century. This experience has opened many doors for me, many of which slammed shut immediately, hitting me in the nose and forehead causing some nasty bruises, let me tell you!

By now I estimate I've played over 3 million hands and taken 2.9 million bad beats. Thank goodness I've been running hot over the last couple of hours so the stats aren't quite as horrendous as they could be....

Having always been the kind of guy who was way too stupid to take "impossible" as a plausible excuse to give up trying to actually win money playing poker, I've read the forums and watched all the pros play on tv, watched their instructional CDs and DVDs, read their blogs, bought their books, even offered small burnt offerings to pictures of them laid out on my desk.

The culmination of my quest to achieve poker riches has been the winning of 91 mtt's over the course of my humble, yet awkwardly pathetic, poker career. Probably some of you think I'm lying and haven't even won one tourney, except maybe a heads up SnG or something. Others are thinking the tourneys only had about 20 or 30 peeps in them and most of them were mentally challenged. I beg to differ. Most of the mtt's had at least 35 peeps and only half the field were at all mentally challenged. You can look it up. Anyway....

That number of wins doesn't equate to greatness, rather to my tenacity and lack of perception that my feat is roughly equal to the theory that if you lashed a million monkeys to a million typewriters for a long enough time, eventually one of them would type out the complete works of Shakespeare completely by random chance.

However, being a great fan of pain and suffering, I've persisted with this even up to the present time. And that's even with the grim knowledge I'm still a hopeless donk who is always going to get sucked out on just at the bubble, my AA crushed by a flopped straight flush by some smart-mouthed little 19 year old who insta-called me pre-flop with J-9 suited.

The real question for you the reader is, why did I bother to read this far? No, I'm sorry, the actual real question is Why did I bother to write this far? No, actually I think we're both wrong! I think the real question is: what, if anything, do I have to offer this community that is of a worthwhile, positive, enlightening, profitable, plus +ev nature?

Sadly, the answer is probably little or nothing. But that almost insignificant detail shall not deter me from posting bloggish type entries occasionally, even though this first post will doubtless be plenty enough to hold most of you for the rest of your lives. And to those of you who feel that way, god speed!

As for those who dare tread deeper into the mind of a micro-donk with true delusions of grandeur, I humbly invite you to watch for my next entry....

Until then, may all my cards be live and all Your cards be totally like dead.

2Slick