I can't even take it anymore. This is getting unreal. I don't even know what to do anymore. May and June are officially losing months, which I can't stand. I know that in poker you will never win all the time or even close to it, but this is driving me crazy.

This losing streak is causing me serious stress both financially and mentally. I don't even know wtf to do anymore. I'm to the point where I feel like I don't even know how to play poker anymore. I looked over the sessions, and there are a few hands where they just had the top of their range, a few coolers, and a few I just played like a jackass...

I just don't even know where to go from here. I'm clueless. I play poker to make money and atm I'm not doing that, and it is causing me an extremely large amount of unnecessary frustration and stress, which I don't need atm...

The worst part about all this is that my BR has shrunk drastically. I still have 30 BI but, i used to have 40-50, and since July is the month to clear my mid-year bonus which i desperately need to help bump my BR back up, I have to play a shit ton in July...like I said before I'm going to take the next two days off and then start grinding July 1...

I think this is the first real losing streak I've had online. Two months of frustration is not fun. I'm sure some of you will read this and be like "buck up it's only 40K hands" but this is causing my life stress that I don't need or want...man I hate $!!!

later all, have a good Sunday.

Sup everyone. Hope your all having a good Saturday so far.

So I'm currently still on a bit of a downswing. My last four sessions I've basically broke even, but it's really been odd. I'm usually pretty consistent and don't do anything too stupid, but lately I either play really good (up 6 BI in two sessions) or really really horrible (down 6 BI in the other two sessions...).

So I'm planning to play tomorrow and then take the rest of the month off, especially since i will be needing to put in serious volume in July to clear my mid-year bonus. So I'm thinking that a break (even if it is only for 2 days) will help me relax a bit and give me some extra study time. I've also planned to tighten up a bit since nothing else has worked to this point. The main thing i need to change though is the fact that if i feel like I'm not into playing i just need to not play at that time. The session where i play poorly is basically me not wanting to play but i do anyways just to get the points for the day in...huge mistake!

I've also been in kind of a funk lately. I don't really know why just feel kind of blah. I'm sure i have an idea what it has to do with but who knows. There seems to be a lot of little things that i get frustrated with and i know that adds up a little each day... Life is a silly thing, and i definitely don't want to turn into a grumpy person the older i get, but it definitely feels like that's the road I'm headed down.

I'm sure the downswing has a little do do with it, but i try and not let poker affect my moods that much, I'm usually pretty good at not showing emotion, especially with the kid around, i wouldn't want her to see her dad in a sad/unhappy mood.

Well have a good weekend everyone.

Hello everyone at tworags.com. I will be cross posting on tworags from my blog sight http://mpjm.blogspot.com/, so that's where you can find all of my previous blog posts.


Just a little about myself: I'm a Married 30 yeard old with an amazing almost 2 year old daughter. I used to play live exclusively, but when the kid arrived, my days of staying at a casino all hours of the night were up, since poker was a large part of my income I needed to make a change...so i decided to get into online poker. I had played previously online before and had moderate success, but I soon realized that live play does not=online play.


I started out by depositing $200 onto FTP in July 07, and started out at 25nl...(good bankroll management) and haven't looked back since. I've went threw a huge transition and have really become a solid player (well at least I think lol). I currently am a 12-14 tabler of 50nl with the occasional shot at 100nl also. I truly love poker and the added benefit it has of providing my family with extra income is a nice bonus also.

Happy Fathers Day everyone. I hope all the fathers out there have a wonderful day.

I'm not planning much for the day. probably just going to watch the U.S. Open, play a little cards, then smoke a really nice cigar that is in the new humidor my amazing wife got for me for Fathers Day. It's seriously the best humidor ever!

Have a wonderful day everyone.