February 6th: I’m stirred awake at 11:30am by the alarm on my cell phone. I feel fairly good considering the events of last night. The airlines had delivered our baggage yesterday, so after a shower I throw on a suit and make my way to the same café for a small morning breakfast. It turns out Stevo left yesterday nearly immediately after busting and Alex and Joel already slipped out, so I have breakfast alone and debate whether I too should go home after inevitably busting my short stack.

When I get to the poker room I find my seat at a table that’s line up includes both roommates Alex and Joel as well as Tony Hachem. In the early goings I raise 88 in late position and Joel calls out of the BB. The flop comes 248 with a flush draw and when he checks I continuation bet. He folds and I tell him “As if Joel Dodds would ever do anything on that flop but check fold…or maybe I just had top set.” The first hour of play is uneventful and card dead for me and it’s not until the second hour that I get involved in a major pot:
My stack: ~19,000, MP2: ~100k, blinds 800/1600 with 200 ante. I hold 7c7h on the CO.
Preflop: Folds to MP2, MP2 raises to 4000, HJ folds, I move all in for 19,200, folds back to MP2. MP2 is a young guy from Canada named Elliot who got third in the Aussie Millions and after running the math makes the call and tables QsTs.
Flop: Kh 7s 9s
The door card is the 7s only to reveal the next two cards giving him an enormous amount of outs. I roll my eyes at what appears to be the deck taunting me.
Turn: 4d
Really? Could I fade this?
River: 6h
Wow, that I was not expecting. I stack up my new chips and start chatting to Elliot who seems like a really cool and down to earth guy.

A few orbits later the blinds have gone up to 1000/2000 and I call a 14k shove from Ben Delaney with A6o in the BB and he tables 55. The board runs out A 5 3 Q 4 and I’m knocked back to about 28,000. A few hands later I shove my stack over a raiser and take it down preflop, then get involved in a larger pot:
My stack: ~35,000, MP1: ~120,000, blinds 1000/2000 with 300 ante. I hold AcKd UTG+1.
Preflop: UTG calls 2000, I raise to 8000, UTG+2 folds, MP1 calls, three folds, the SB calls, BB calls, UTG calls. Jesus can’t somebody just shove for me?
Flop: Kc 6c 4h
Fair enough. SB checks, BB checks, UTG checks, and I decide to do something unusual and check as well (I wouldn’t do this without the Ac.) MP1 bets 15,000, it folds back to me and I move all in for 26,000 total. MP1 thinks it over then makes the call and tables AdTd. Um, what?
Turn: Kh
River: 6c
Suddenly I’ve gone from one of the short stacks to one of the larger ones on the table, as I nearly tripled up in that hand.

Just a few hands later I find AK again on the button and the HJ open shoves for 12,000. I make the call and he tables A2 which promptly flops a 2 that holds up, putting me back around 78,000.

An orbit or so later a new player is moved to the table on the direct left of Tony Hachem. As the player sets his chips down he’s dealt his cards and puts his hand on them while standing up. At this moment Tony Hachem raises to 4500 and the player being moved looks at his cards while standing up and then raises it to 20,000 while in the process of sitting down but technically not in his seat yet. This sets off Tony who starts demanding that the other players hand be called dead because he was not in his seat. There is moderate argument between him and the dealer before the floor is called over. The moved player, Tony, and the dealer all explain their sides of what happened in what order. Tony’s description of events involve considerable colorful language. The tournament director thinks things over then rules that the hand is still live because the player was being moved.
“That’s fucking ridiculous!!” fumes Tony.
“EVERY FUCKING TIME IN THIS CASINO! THESE FUCKING DEALERS HAVE NO CLUE, LAST YEAR THE DEALER TOLD A PLAYER TO CALL MY BET AND YET AGAIN THIS YEAR THEY FUCK UP AND HE’S JUST TRYING TO COVER HIS ASS!”
The dealer remains quiet and motionless, unsure how to react to the verbal bombardment.
“TONY! LANGUAGE!” reprimands the tournament director.
“FUCKING RIDICULOUS!” he repeats. “I don’t agree with the ruling, bring over Danny McDonough!”
Danny quickly hurries over to the table and yet again the events of the hand are rehashed. Throughout the telling the player who has reraised Tony tells him that he’s happy to show him his cards after the hand. Tony tells him it’s not his fault and continues to assign blame to the dealer. Danny considers the story and tells Tony that he is not the tournament director for this tournament and therefore the tournament directors ruling on the situation is the one that stands. Tony remains sitting arms crossed in his chair swearing and leaving his cards in front of him, in play. God knows how long the whole saga has taken at this point. Eventually Elliot, who is seating two seats to Tony’s left, pipes up and says “Okay, I’ve got to call the clock here.”
“OH WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GETTING INVOLVED FOR!?” explodes Tony.
“You’re not even in the hand mate! Shut up before I put one on your chin and knock you back to Canada!” he threatens.
Tony is, by my guess, 5’9” and 160 pounds in his early thirties. Elliot appears to be around 6’5” and an athletic looking 225 and 21 years old. He’s a giant fucking dude. Elliot keeps his cool though, and tells Tony something like “I need to play poker here man.”

Tony remains motionless in his chair fuming for another moment or so. The clock has been officially called and after counting down most of his seconds Tony angrily mucks his hand. The player who reraised him shows him 88. Just a couple hands later Tony is given further cause for infuriation:
My stack: ~85,000, Tony Hachem: ~75,000, blinds 1000/2000 with a 300 ante. I hold K8o in the BB.
Preflop: Folds to Tony in MP1, Tony calls for 2000, MP2 folds, the HJ calls, folds to the SB, SB completes, I check in the BB
Flop: Kd Kc 8h
Ding ding ding! The SB checks and because there’s no flush draw and live players give up too easily I decide to check as well. Tony bets 4000, the HJ calls, SB folds, I call. I’m not sure about my flop line here, but I feel like if I lead or checkraise I’ll get snap folds much too often, and considering Tony is fuming from the ruling he just got I want to give him as many opportunities to bluff as possible.
Turn: 3d
Everyone checks.
River: Jd
I bet 14,000, Tony quickly calls, the HJ folds. Tony instantly turns over his Ad7d and I show him my full house and compliment him on not getting stacked. After the hand he decides to take a walk and is absent from the table for a round or so.

After things settle down my friend Dave Ewing gets moved to the table, who was one of the guys around the girl I’m seeing last night. I ask him how she was for the rest of the night and he tells me they had to order her food to keep her from raging and ranting at them and that she kept them up for hours. I apologize to him several times and thank him for looking out for her. Then I ask if he tried to reason with her, which he assures me he and many others did.
“Man, how bad is it that the girl I’m seeing gets super pissed and ends it with me and you’re the one who winds up losing sleep and consoling her for hours while I get stoned with my friends and play video games?” We both crack up at the absurdity.

Not long after our conversation she comes downstairs with Julian to say goodbye to Dave before they head back to Melbourne. She’s wearing enormous sunglasses that block out half her face and when I try to walk over to talk to her she runs off. Fuck.

Between all the drama real poker is going on however, and soon I’m involved with my roommate Alex in a large pot:
My stack: ~130,000, Alex: ~140,000, blinds 1500/3000 with 500 ante. I hold 5h9d on the CO.
Preflop: Folds around to me on the CO, with such high antes and fairly nity players in the blinds I’m looking to open a huge range, which the 59o I look down at seems to be included in. I raise to 7500 and Alex on the button thinks briefly then calls. Both blinds fold.
Flop: Qd 5s 3s
I fire out 9000 and Alex calls. At this point I intend to shut down as I think Alex is willing to call down considerable aggression from me pretty wide and in the event he’s calling with ace high thinking it’s good I’ll beat him at showdown.
Turn: 5d
Fuck shutting down. I consider my bet size then fire out 22,000. Alex thinks briefly then calls.
River: Js
At first glance the spade looks like a scare card, but I’m 99% sure Alex can’t have spades here because he’d raise me on either the flop or turn, unless perhaps he has specifically KsQs and was giving me a chance to spew. Otherwise I’m certain I have the best hand, I just need to figure out how much to value bet. I think it over then line up a couple of large stacks and slide in a bet of 40,000. Alex thinks for a very long time before finally announcing call. I table my hand and for a brief second Alex thinks he’s picked off a bluff before he see’s the 5 and recoils in disgust. With that pot I become one of the chip leaders of the tournament.

An orbit later I’m involved again, this time with the strange player who had the AdTd in the AK hand where I tripled up:
My stack: ~210k, HJ: ~42,000, blinds 1500/3000 with a 500 ante. I hold Ks9c in MP2.
Preflop: Folds around to me, I raise to 7500, folds to the HJ, the HJ calls, everyone else folds.
Flop: Kh 6c 7s
I check, the HJ bets 10,000, I call.
Turn: 9d
I check, the HJ moves all in and I instantly call. He shows KQo and stands up and starts to walk away, but a player at the table tells him to stick around just in case.
River: Qd
The table goes nuts after having called the card and I quietly slide out the necessary chips into the pot.

Not long after that pot I’m moved tables and find myself on the direct right of Celina. When I sit down I immediately start cracking jokes about her short stack and asking her why she’s such a nit (I had 15% of her in the tournament.) A few minutes later I’m eating my words:
My stack: ~185k, Celina: ~37,500, blinds 2000/4000 with a 500 ante. I hold As4c on the HJ.
Preflop: Folds to me, I raise to 10,500, Celina moves all in for 37,500, it folds back to me, I make the call and she tables ATo.
“God please let me suck you out, so epic.”
Flop: Q 9 3
Celina is standing up wide eyed with anticipation. I’m sitting in my seat counting out 37,500 in chips and trying to think of something clever to say if I hit a 4.
Turn: 6
River: 3
Celina cheers with excitement and naturally starts needling me. I should’ve thought of something clever to say if I didn’t hit the 4.

For the rest of the 2000/4000 level I’m pretty card dead so I hang out chatting to Celina about the events of the previous night and how they’ve panned out since. I tell her that that my icy disposition might make me infuriating to date it’s damn useful when you can play a tournament without a thought in your head about your current social shit storm. Then I open raise the 3000/6000 blinds with 22 to 15,000 and she shoves for 35,000 total over the top of me. When it folds back I obviously make the call and she tables KK which holds up by flopping a boat.

Around this time we’re fast approaching the bubble of 18 players. There’s an older woman on my right who is clearly pretty clueless about the game. Not clueless in the sense that I’m trying to insult her, but clueless in the sense that she may or may not be aware of the rules of the game. I say this because on day one she was involved in a large pot with my friend Ali Khalil where he moved all in on the river with a set of twos and it took her several minutes to call with the absolute nut straight. While on the table with her I asked her whether she knew she was slowrolling in the hand and our exchange was something like
“I just wanted to think it over, I’m not an all in player you know? Besides he didn’t know what he was doing, he went all in with nothing!”
“Um, didn’t he have a set?”
“He had two’s! He had nothing, I’d never go all in with two’s!”
“I see.”
At that moment another player on the table who witnessed the hand spoke up and confirmed that Ali indeed did have a set of two’s.
“Yea what’s he going all in with two’s for?” she asked.

However, while on the table with her today I did witness her shove her eight BB stack over a limper with KTo, which was fairly surprising. Having witnessed this hand made my decision in the one we got involved in much easier:
My stack: ~100k, lady: ~120k, blinds 4000/8000 with a 1000 ante. I hold AsJs in the SB.
Preflop: Folds to the lady on the button, she open raises to 40,000. I think briefly about her bet size, then decide that after seeing her KT and the fact that she is so clueless this must be a shove, especially since she’ll fold a ton of pairs because she doesn’t want to risk bubbling. I move all in for a bit under 100,000 and the BB folds. The lady goes into the tank, thinks it over, spends nearly two minutes contemplating, and then makes the call with AKo. Charming.
Flop: J T 6
The door card is the jack of diamonds. I don’t react because I make a point never to react at these things, but Christ does it feel good on the inside. Now I just need it to hold.
Turn: 2
One time dealer?
River: 6
I give the smallest of fist pumps and a nod to Timex and Watts who are on the rail watching. After all the times things have gone horribly wrong for me on live tournament bubbles, getting a suck out in my favor feels incredibly good. I almost certainly have a huge shit eating grin on my face.

A short while later the bubble breaks and we enter the money with my having about 20 BB’s. We redraw for tables and I wind up on one with Dave Ewing, Celina, Deano Nyberg and James ‘Jabba’ Broom. During the early stages I am very card dead and my stack starts dwindling. It’s not until the blinds have gone up two levels that I’m involved in a major pot again:
My stack: ~155k, Celina: ~400k, blinds 6000/12000 with 1000 ante. I hold QJo on the HJ six handed.
Preflop: UTG folds, I move all in for 155k, folds to Celina in the SB, Celina moves in over the top, BB folds, and Celina tables ATo.
Flop: 2 Q 7
Sweet!
Turn: 3
River: 2


After that I hit an incredible rush of hands. I find AK and KK God knows how many times plus a slew of good hands to open raise with. My stack soars to close to the chip lead of the tournament and absolutely everything is going my way. Between all the big hands to three bet with I also sneak one in with 52o against Celina when she open raises after winning a big hand because I’m aware that it’s very risky for her to pull a huge light four bet especially considering the sponsorship factor in that she needs a proper result to put on her résumé. However, between all my raising and three betting I do find myself in one interesting three way spot.

My stack: ~500k, Jabba: ~400k, blinds 6000/12000 with a 1000 ante. I hold Td9d on the button.
Preflop: Folds to me, I raise to 30,000, Celina calls in the SB, Jabba calls in the BB.
Flop: Kh Qc 4h
Everyone checks.
Turn: Th
Everyone checks.
River: 4d
Celina checks, Jabba thinks for a while then bets 85,000. I go into the tank for quite a while and start considering the hand. I know that Jabba defends incredibly wide in the BB, especially if there’s a SB call. I also have seen him use smaller bets for value and larger bets as bluffs. Additionally, I don’t think there’s a ton of hands in his value betting range that play like this. If he had AJ he would have certainly 3 bet pre. If he had hearts he would likely have bet the turn, if not led the flop. Same with a king, though I think sometimes he’d play a weak king like this. I also think there’s a good chance in a hand played this passively on the final table bubble he’d consider taking a shot fairly often on the river. I decide to make the call and Celina folds. Jabba tables 42o and I feel stupid while I muck my hand.

After that things continue to fall my way and I take down a ton of pots pre flop and on the flop. When the 10th place player is eliminated I find myself with 635,000 in chips which I’m fairly sure is good for the chip lead (it wasn’t, I was in second.)

After we finish bagging up the chips I give Ben Delaney a call and ask him where they’re going out to for his birthday. We have to be back at 12:30pm for the start of the final table and it’s currently almost 1am, so while I can’t have a huge night I’d like to at least stop by and buy the birthday boy a beer.

As I’m walking out of the casino with Timex and Watts I send the girl I’m seeing a text message that reads “So I’ve made the final table with the chip lead and it would be really cool to talk to you and clear my head beforehand. Otherwise I’ll see you around Melbourne.” A few minutes later she calls me and we discuss last night. She apologizes for having had too much too drink and overreacting. I apologize for bailing out so quick and for the rather complicated situation. The only problem is that I’ve got my sweet talking voice on (you know, that voice you use to talk to the woman in your life that you pretend around your guy friends doesn’t exist) but Watts and Timex are standing right next to me and Watts gives me a look that communicates inaudibly “You are such a pussy Bond.” By the end of the conversation everything is cool and is often the case with women she’s gone from hot, to ice cold, to flaming hot within 24 hours.

When we arrive at the bar the 10 minute walk in the Adelaide heat has us sticking to our clothes. Apparently it was 45 Celsius today and things certainly haven’t cooled down too much by the night. The bar is mostly deserted so I tell everyone they should just come over to mine to drink and smoke on the balcony’s balcony. We all agree to meet up there and I head back while I message a croupier friend to come over as well.

As it turns out the group decides to stay out at another bar and I don’t join them because I need to be up in the morning. A few others come over as well as my croupier friend, who whips out one of his own joints which he rolled up with what has become the semi legendary ‘super weed’. He’s told me several times what the super weed is a blend of, but against all odds I’ve managed to forget it. We fire it up and sit out on the downstairs balcony discussing the various random and interesting shit we always do when we hang out. Eventually the group decides we should roll up another and it occurs to me that “This should, no not should, MUST be smoked on the balcony’s balcony!” By the time we light it up we all agree that smoking on the balcony’s balcony was a “Damn good decision. We’re making some good decisions here boys, in a day filled with good decisions!”

February 7th: Though some would think that with the pressure of a considerable final table looming in the horizon I would have trouble sleeping the super weed I smoked last night put me into a sufficient THC induced coma. I feel quite good upon waking up and after my shower throw on the second suit I brought with me and head down to the same café again.

I make it to the casino a solid 15 minutes early to prevent any possible repea lateness fiasco, though considering it’s only a three block walk I can’t imagine what could possibly go so wrong. Then again I said the same about my 10 minute drive the day of the Aussie Millions final table when I left over a half hour early. When I arrive I find out I am in fact not quite the chip leader, a position which is held by Karl Krautschneider who has 662,000. I’ve drawn a mediocre seat with Deano on my direct left and Celina three on my left, though I at least have position on Jabba. Cards get in the air at 12:30 after brief introductions, and I set my mind to the task of winning the very first ANZPT event.

My position on Jabba becomes irrelevant when he is eliminated on the first hand in a flip against Melbourne player Bruno Portaro. Just a few hands later Bruno and I are involved in my first pot at the table:
My stack: ~635k, Bruno: ~1m, blinds 6000/12000 with a 1000 ante, I hold 5c5d on the button.
Preflop: Bruno raises UTG to 32,000, folds to me on the button, I call, both blinds fold.
Flop: A T 5 rainbow
Bruno checks, I bet 45,000, Bruno calls.
Turn: J, full rainbow.
Bruno checks, I bet 115k, Bruno check min raises to 230k and I think things over briefly. Considering the texture and that Bruno has check min raised me I don’t see any reason why not to shove right now, especially since a Q or K could kill my action on the river and he’s representing a huge hand with his line. I move all in and Bruno goes into the tank for a very long time. He’s talking to himself and to me but I remain silent and stare straight at the table. After a very long consideration he flashes an ace and folds, and with that pot I take over the clear chip lead.

An orbit later I’m involved again:
My stack: ~900k, button: ~225k, blinds 6000/12000 with 1000 ante. I hold 7c7d on the HJ.
Preflop: Folds around to me, I raise to 32,000, CO folds, button moves all in for 225k, both blinds fold, I think it over and call. The button shows QJo and we’re off to the races.
Flop: 3 Q J
Shit.
Turn: 4
River: 9
I count out the chips and slide them his way.

The next few orbits see a very fast drop off of players. Bruno loses a huge pot to Karl when he hits a miracle queen on the river after getting it all in on a K94 flop with QQ against Bruno’s AK for a ton of chips. I continue to take jabs at more small pots, but it’s not long until I’m involved in a larger one with local player Julius Coleman:
My stack: ~750k, Julius: ~600k, blinds 8000/16000 with 2000 ante. I hold Ah2c in the BB.
Preflop: Folds around to Julius in the SB, Julius raises to 40,000, I call.
Flop: A 6 3 rainbow
Julius bets 55,000, I call.
Turn: J
Julius bets 110k, I call.
River: J
Julius thinks for quite a while and checks, I check behind. Julius shows 6s7s and I take down the pot.

Things continue to go poorly for Julius after the hand and his stack dwindles. Meanwhile, Deano wins a flip over Celina to knock her out in seventh place without her getting much of a chance to get involved at the final table. Soon three of us are involved in a considerable pot:
My stack: ~900k, Deano: ~900k, Julius: ~200k, blinds 8000/16000 with 2000 ante. I hold JsJc UTG at a 6 handed table.
Preflop: I raise to 40,000, Deano calls, folds around to Julius in the BB, Julius calls.
Flop: J 5 4 rainbow
Julius moves all in for 160k and I think for a little while before calling, hoping Deano gets involved too. Deano quickly folds and when Julius tables his QJo and see’s my JJ he knows he’s just about finished.
Turn: K
River: X
I shake Julius’s hand and tell him good game. Just a few hands later Deano winds up busting to Karl in a very big pot where the ace of diamonds is on a paired three diamond board and Deano has the queen high flush against Karl’s king high one. On a strictly equity level, I was happy to see the hand go down as it did, which is a compliment to Deano.

Not long after we finish the second level and find ourselves having dropped five players in the first two hours of play, despite the fact that they wound it back a level to make the average stack roughly 40 BB’s. Shortly after we come back we lose another player and it’s down to three handed between myself, Karl, and a guy named Daniel from Canberra who is playing quite aggressively. We play a pot where he mentions to me afterwards that he really should’ve bet his top pair on the turn in order to protect, a piece of information that soon becomes relevant:
My stack: ~1.3m, Daniel: ~800k, blinds 10,000/20,000 with 2000 ante. I hold 45o in the SB.
Preflop: Button folds, I raise to 60,000, Daniel calls.
Flop: Ac 4c 6d
I bet 80,000, Daniel calls.
Turn: 6h
I check, Daniel checks.
River: Js
I check, Daniel bets 130,000. On one hand his bet looks like pure value, on the other every draw missed and after our previous conversation I really think if he had an ace he’d have bet it. I think he either has a missed draw or a six that was slow playing on the turn. I make the call and it turns out I’m half right, he has A6. I wince and slide him a bunch of chips.

After that Daniel pounds me over and over on my left. I can’t seem to find anything close to a proper starting hand, and every time I open Daniel seems to have a three bet ready for me or he flat calls and raises my flop bet. Karl is a fairly passive player who rarely bluffs and is difficult to make fold, so without hands it’s very hard to get value out of him. My stack has been decimated by the time I’m involved in another major pot:
My stack: ~750k, Daniel: ~1.2m, blinds 10,000/20,000 with 2000 ante. I hold Ks8s in the SB.
Preflop: Button folds, I raise to 60,000, Daniel calls.
Turn: Jc 2s 9s
I think over my bet size and lead 60,000 so in case Daniel makes a decent sized raise I’ll have room to shove with fold equity. Daniel makes a raise to 160k, which is smaller than expected but my play is still clear against someone as aggressive as him. I announce all in and Daniel calls instantly and tables J8o. Wow, owned.
Turn: Js
I don’t react, I still have quite a few outs to dodge.
River: 6c

I let out a long breath and let the dealer count out my chips. My stack is half as big as Karl’s now, while Daniel is substantially shorter by comparison. Just a few hands later Daniel and I are involved again:
My stack: 1.3m, Daniel: ~500k, blinds 12,000/24,000 with a 3000 ante. I hold AcQc on the button.
Preflop: I raise to 60,000, Daniel shoves from the SB for 500k, Karl folds, I instantly call and Daniel tables KcJc. Ace on the flop one time?
Flop: 5d 2c 3c
That’s not bad either.
Turn: 8h
River: 4c
I shake Daniel’s hand and tell him “Very well played.” He gave me an enormous amount of trouble on my left and I’m happy to see him go and be heads up with Karl. Karl seems to be a fairly inexperienced player and going into heads up we’re close to 100 BB’s effective. My plan is to try and take jabs at him and win small pots until he makes a mistake in a big one. I told Timex and Watts last night “I don’t know guys, I just got a feeling about this one, I’m gonna fucking win it” and right now I’ve never been more confident. The casino staff brings out the trophy and sets the cash on the table in bundles of Australian hundred dollar bills. It all looks very good and since giving away my Bellagio bracelet I don’t have any physical representation of my poker accomplishments. A trophy would do fine, though unfortunately it’s not one of those big cup like trophies that you could drink out of, which will be the first thing I do if I ever win such a trophy.

Head’s up starts very slow, and as expected most of the pots are quite small with me taking several jabs at them. I’m raising or calling 100% of buttons and mostly folding to his aggression post flop because he doesn’t seem particularly adept at getting value from his hands and I’ve only seen him bluff once so far in the tournament after playing with him for several hours. By the time our first large pot comes up we are nearly even in chips:
My stack: ~1.9m, Karl: ~2.2m, blinds 12,000/24,000 with 3000 ante. I hold K8o in the BB.
Preflop: Karl completes the SB, I check in the BB.
Flop: 2s 4c Ks
I check, Karl checks.
Turn: 5c
I bet 50,000, Karl calls.
River: 8c
I bet 100,000, Karl calls. I table my top two pair like the nuts I know it is and Karl shows me 67o for a straight. Whoa, didn’t see that coming.

Around this time I turn around and notice that the rail has become pretty big. Most chairs are full and there are a number of people standing up watching. Timex, Watts, and Elliot are sitting in the front row following along intently. I decide to have some fun.
“JESUS CHRIST! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THREE DOING!? WHY ARE YOU NOT DRUNK YET, YOU CALL YOURSELVES RAILTARDS!? THIS IS AMATEUR HOUR, WHERE IS THE WAITRESS?!”
I turn to a guy I don’t know sitting next to them, point at them and yell “THE FUCK!?” The guy I’m talking to raises the beer he’s drinking and says “Ya don’t gotta tell me mate.” It’s unclear whether most people witnessing this can tell whether I’m joking.

When we return to play things continue as before. I keep playing small pots with Karl and taking down considerably more than my share but mostly folding when he shows aggression unless I have a decent hand, which I am finding nearly zero of. It takes quite a while to get involved in another major pot:
My stack: ~1.9m, Karl: ~2.2m, blinds 12,000/24,000 with 3000 ante. I hold Kd2d in the BB.
Preflop: Karl raises to 60,000, I call. It’s not standard but I think deep stacked against someone who gives up much too easy post flop it’s a +EV call.
Flop: Kc 2s 4c
I check, Karl bets 60,000, I raise to 200,000, Karl announces all in and I call instantly expecting to see a worse king. Karl tables 9c8c and with the way he’s been hitting at this final table I’m pretty apprehensive about this.
Turn: 3d
Sweet. Okay, just one more card from essentially having the whole tournament in the bag. If I can dodge this club I’ll have the sounds cool but is essentially irrelevant title of winning the first ever event on a poker tour.
River: 7c
I wince slightly then quickly compose myself. Karl sits motionless, stunned and unsure what to say or how to react. I shake his hand, tell him “Congrats on your win” then walk over the rail and straight to the bar. As I’m waiting in line David Steike and Andrew Scott intercept me and offer to buy me a drink.
“We were watching, sorry about that. I can tell you need one” says David.
“Here, have this too” he says, then whips out a Davidoff cigar. “I just had a baby.”
“Oh, congratulations, and on your 100k win at the Aussie Millions, I don’t think we’ve spoke since. What can’t you do?”

I sit at a table discussing tournament poker with them and how you can’t let things like getting rivered for a tournament bother you if you’re going to play them for a living, that it’s “All cool.” I wonder if I sound convincing.

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