May 2nd, Madison: Today wound up being a very straight forward day, not particularly suitable for blogging. I sat home and grinded online tournaments all afternoon and evening as it is Sunday, and then I went to the gym for about an hour and a half. I cashed some of my tournaments but nothing particularly interesting happened, and my work out was obviously pretty straight forward. As such, I’d like to use this blog entry to make some WSOP predictions. I mentioned this entry to my friend David Huber at pocketfives, and we decided to use it as a front page article there for a day before I put it up here:

It’s that time of year again! As the WSOP fast approaches people have many questions and predictions, and after spending some time in Vegas I thought I’d drop in to offer a few of my own.

1. Field sizes will be down, but only very slightly: Many people seem worried this year that with the recession, swine flu, and almost zero preliminary events being filmed this year that the numbers will be down considerably. They point to how other tournaments have done throughout the continental US as their major piece of evidence. They are correct that US fields are down, but it seems globally that the game is doing very well. The EPT was enormous this year, and the LAPT and APPT both had respectable turnouts on top of the random events that weren’t associated with a major tour throughout the world. I think the WSOP will take a very small dip, but nothing noticeable or that should really concern anyone.
2. Online players will crush the NLH events, again: If you look back over the last few years NLH events at the WSOP you’ll realize that there is a considerable percentage of online kids who are winning them (though obviously not entirely.) I think this year with more small NLH events that plenty of guys can play or bet backed for, plus more and more kids coming of age, means we’ll see another year of the kids showing what they can do.
3. Devilfish will make hundreds of young women uncomfortable: But then, how is this different from any other six week period of the year?
4. Durrr will own fools: Oh God, so many fools will be owned by Durrr. He frightens me with his owning abilities. The question about Durrr is whether he’ll spend time playing many WSOP events instead of high stakes cash that gets together in Bobby’s room or other places, though how much big action gets up in Bobby’s is a question in it of itself.
5. As far as a few specific guesses for MTT guys who will crush; Shaundeeb, Zeejustin, Luckychewy: I feel like Shaun has really got his head in the right place to do some crushing this year. I mean obviously there is always a shit ton of variance involved, but in terms of picking a guy who has pretty much blanked out live to do something big I feel like Shaun is the clear choice. He is always sober when playing live these days and he’s put up some insane results lately I just wonder what kind of mental plane he’s on. While hanging out with him in Vegas I really got the sense that his memory for players and their tendencies and understanding of how to manipulate that history is something special that most guys simply don’t have or don’t have the focus to bother executing.

Zeejustin seems like a perennial threat to do something big, and he just showed off his skills by winning the Caesar’s $5,000 circuit event. Talking to other people about him you get the sense that everyone agrees that he’s a very switched on and capable guy with a really excellent game. When I discussed hands with him during my time in Vegas in April I could tell he was thinking over every detail and angle of the hand (particularly against Men the Master) and was essentially very impressed with his analytical skills. He’ll also be playing a high number of events including mixed games, which makes it likely we see him at some final tables.
Luckychewy is a guy I’ve been talking about for years. He’s recently had a couple of major results by winning the $2,500 heads up event in the WCOOP as well as a very deep run in the WPT championship. He’ll be playing a ton of events and my conversations with him was by far one of the most influential factors in the development of my own game, and there was a hell of a lot more learning from him than he did from me in those talks. Most don’t know his real name, but watch for Andrew Lichtenberger deep in WSOP events.

6. Phil Hellmuth will enter the main event with 20 women on each arm: Because entering it with five on each simply isn’t enough. Then they will all sit around looking pretty and clapping if he wins a pot and remain quiet when he loses and yells “HUNNY! HUNNY! HE CALLED ME WITH A QUEEN-TEN! GAAAAAAAAAAH!!!” at the crowd. Then when I hit on them they will claim they have no idea who he is.
7. The WSOP ME will get roughly 6,500 players: Following through on my guess about the WSOP being down slightly I think it will carry over to the main event. Last year got 6,844 and I think this year we’re looking at roughly 6,500, though for this event particularly an increase actually wouldn’t shock me.
8. The WSOP will be run quite smoothly throughout: The improvement in the operations between 2008 and the two years previous to it was enormous. My assumption is that by this year any minor remaining issues that were a problem should be ironed out, as they really seemed to pay attention to detail last year. We saw a considerable reduction in giant lines, no more tent, a separate room for satellites as well as a separate room that often held the day 2 of tournaments, plus an efficient cage room that rarely had a line of more than a few people for it.
9. Men the Master angle shoot over/under: Depends how many events he plays, but I feel like he probably fits in one solid angle per tournament. He plays a ton, so I’ll take a shot at about 30 over the course of the summer. That’s just on the table mind you.
10. Some truly insane prop bets will go down: As they always do around WSOP time. Ivey will probably make some bet so balla that it makes the cumulative ballaness of every rap artist ever appear meager and inconsequential by comparison, even Biggie. If people have ideas for really nutso ones I’d encourage them to contact me, as I threw away my dignity a long time ago and would be interested in some cool action.

May 1st, Madison: I am woken up at 8:10am by Semo standing over me telling me to “Get the fuck up.”
“Ooooooh God, are we really doing this?” I ask.
“Yes, we need to start drinking soon now get your lazy ass up.”
“God damn it Semo.”

Sarah slowly comes to consciousness and we both start cursing about how early it is. I go into the bathroom and brush my teeth, then step into the kitchen where four of us are standing around talking about our upcoming day. Semo says we need to head out, so I give Sarah a hug and kiss, and then we depart. We walk over to his apartment and find an already awake and drinking Chewy. He makes us all breakfast and David starts cranking tunes so we all dance around the apartment like a bunch of jackasses:



A few women friends of David’s come over and we all start drinking beers. Then we decide it’s time to hit the house parties and go to the end of Mifflin for a party in an apartment building on the end that has an outdoor beer pong table. Semo and I start challenging people and eventually get a game with Allison and Chewy. It’s very windy out and it makes the aiming difficult, but I get to drink plenty of beer so I’m happy. The guys hosting the apartment have a keg on the roof and are doing keg stands up there while we play. I feel too tired for such things.

We hang out for a couple hours then Semo and I break off to hit up another party on Mifflin. On our way there I suggest we take some pictures with the police so we walk up and politely ask for a photo
“Will you guys take one beating me with your canes?” I ask. They decline and we go with the nice ones:



I decide I need some food so we hit a sub place, then walk to another party. The street is starting to fill up with people, but it’s nowhere near capacity yet. There is a bunch of speakers set up in the center of the block cranking music that everyone is dancing to, and every single house seems to be having a party. We go to our next party and wait for my friend Mark and David’s friend Gurby to meet us up. We keep chugging the now semi warm beer that Semo is carrying around in his backpack, then take some group pictures:

We go inside the party and starting hanging with people. David has us meet up a group of about 10 very outgoing black chicks that also randomly has some white girl from Melbourne Australia in it as well. They are all fun as hell and we hang out in the kitchen flirting with them:



I chat up a girl named Isabelle (name changed) and get to the point that we’re calling each other hubby and wifey. We discuss cooking and she mentions that a man has never cooked for her before. I tell her I will and that she should put her number in my phone and I’ll call her about making dinner. She puts her number in and we go back to drinking and flirting.

After some now indiscernible amount of time we decide to go to another party and go outside. The street is now absolutely packed with people:


Even the back alley’s behind the actual row of houses is just packed with people:


We go over to another party and continue drinking beer out of the backpack. The largest problem of the day is finding a place to piss, as the line at the parties is always around 10 people long and if you go out back you risk being arrested, and I see several people get caught for it and dragged off in handcuffs. Everywhere is completely packed and everyone is totally wasted. I feel buzzed but more exhausted from lack of sleep than drunk. I see some girl at the party that used to like me in high school but she was 15 when I was 18 so I never did anything about it. I have forgotten her name so I walk up and say
“Hey, aren’t you Lindsay Walker’s little sister’s friend?”
“Yea, I’m Sam (name changed). You’re Tony”
“Yes that’s right, Sam. Sorry, it’s been so many years.”
“That’s okay.”

I chat to Sam for quite a while then say bluntly “So you used to have a crush on me in high school yea?”
“Yea I did, you’re still so cute.”
“Well it takes one to know one.”
We discuss why I never went after her in high school and I mention the age thing. She thinks it cool that jail bait wasn’t my scene. I tell her we should meet up later in the night and she agrees. She puts her number in my phone then runs off to another party.

We head back to the party we were at before and chill out in the back. Some guy sitting in a chair talking to us falls asleep as it seems everyone today is on around four hours sleep. Obviously he gets photos taken of him:


Semo and I decide to take a break from everything and go back to his apartment for a bit. It’s near 6pm and we have been drinking since 9am. I lie down in Chewy’s bed and take a nap.

I awake at 8pm the sound of Semo and Chewy talking. They are discussing what we’re going to do for the evening. After I stir myself to proper consciousness I find that I am feeling much better and definitely in the mood to keep the night going. Chewy says he knows of another party for us to go to, so we down a couple beers at the apartment then head out. On the way I pick up a sandwich so I have something in my stomach.

We arrive at the party and Semo and I immediately commandeer the beer pong table. We talk two girls into playing with us and we each partner up with one. It turns out mine is from Hawaii and knows my friend Cade London. She is very cool and we start crushing at beer pong. One of her friends comes up to me and says that she hears I play poker for a living. She is a cute Hispanic girl named Maria (name changed) and we talk a ton about travel. She mentions that she was a very serious gymnast and I say to her
“Well I have to confess, though it’s a secret, that I did gymnastics for three years of middle school…though I am heterosexual.” We wind up standing next to each other leaning against the wall talking for around 20 minutes. Her leg bumps into mine and she apologizes
“It’s okay, you can play footsie with me, I won’t tell anyone.” She is very curious about poker and I tell her we should play some time. She agrees and I have her put her number into my phone.

Eventually we tire of the beer pong and head out to my favorite bar in all of Madison, Maduro’s. It’s a cigar bar right off the capitol, and we meet my old friends that I met by hanging out in a cigar and wine store from the ages of 18-21 on the West side. We’re thrilled to see each other and spend quite a bit of time catching up:


The rest of our group makes it over to the bar and we all hang out drinking cocktails and smoking cigars:




I make a ton of plans with my friend Matthew (the blond haired guy in the pictures) to go down to Chicago over a weekend and tear the place up. He’s the kind of awesome guy to hang out with that seems to know everyone and somehow have all the right hook ups, and spending time with guys like him and Robert (the black guy in the pictures) did a lot to culture me at a young age and give me a knowledge base for cigars and wine.

I never quite get fully drunk over the course of the evening, which is quite fine as I’m not interested in having a serious hangover. Eventually I get tired and decide to just take a cab back to the West side instead of staying over at Semo’s again as I’d have to crash on the couch. I get home at 4:30am and make myself some food, then fall asleep exhausted.

April 30th, Milwaukee: I wake up when Jenson enters the room. I look at the clock; it reads 8:21am.
“Oh sorry, did I wake you?” he says
“Oh, no not really, I think I was kind of up and just not fully aware of it. I got to sleep super early last night. You off to work?”
“Yea, off to the working world for me.”
“Alright dude, have a good one. I’m just gonna hang out writing today, I’ll be back here at 6pm to get the ride back to Madison with you.”
“Sounds good buddy, later.”

I lay around in bed for a while debating whether I’m actually going to get up or try to fall back asleep. It’s so bright in the room that I eventually give up on the idea of sleep and throw on some shorts and tennis shoes. I go for a run around the neighborhood then return home and take a shower.

I walk over to ‘Whole Foods’ where my friend Derek works and ask if he’s around. They tell me he’s currently on break. I order an Asian chicken stir fry and have a seat in the café area. Derek eventually returns from his break and hangs around chatting to me for a bit before he has to return to work. When I finish my food I walk over to the nearby coffee shop and run into a class mate from college. We can’t remember each other’s names anymore when we see each other.

I hang around the café writing for several hours. When the time approaches 5pm my computer starts running low on battery so I pack it up and walk back to Jenson’s place. He returns home shortly afterwards and I pack up my things then we drag the heavy bags downstairs into his car.

The ride from Milwaukee to Madison is about 90 minutes and we spend the duration talking about my experiences abroad, his career options, and his relationship to his girlfriend Ali. For a long time I thought Jenson would pursue a serious career in film, but after spending some time in the industry he’s questioning whether that’s the right track for him. Unfortunately there’s not a ton of film work in Milwaukee compared to most other cities.

When we arrive in Madison he drives us over to the West side and drops me off at my parents house. I ring the bell and nobody answers. I open up the garage door and bring my bags inside. A bit later my parents and brother return home and we make plans to get dinner, though my brother Joey has already eaten so he won’t be joining us. My parents give me the option of choosing the restaurant, I pick Thai.

At the restaurant I catch them up with what I’ve been up to since we last spoke in person nearly a year ago. At the time they’d come out to visit me in Las Vegas during the WSOP and check out the city, a 180 turn from their years of disapproval at my career choice. At dinner they do their best to catch me up on people I knew growing up, but at this point their names and relevancy are starting to slip from memory in some cases.

After dinner they drop me off to meet my brother at ‘Pegasus Games’, a gaming store that sells things like ‘Magic Cards’, which I collected throughout middle school. I’ve grown out of those things since, but I still enjoy having geeky conversations about X-men, DC comics, anime, and whatever else. There is a cute girl working behind the counter that my brother clearly likes. When we leave the store I ask him to drive me down to a party at my friends place and spend the ride instructing him how to get her phone number.

We park the car near the campus downtown. I tell my brother he should come to the party with me and hang out for a bit. We get up to the apartment and I am greeted by my good friend Semo who visited me in Australia, and I lunge at him for a huge hug then we exchange our standard racial slur barrage
“Holy fuck it’s good to see you money grubbing Jew son of a bitch!” I yell
“Right back at ya you greasy haired dago guinea mother fucker!” he retorts.

He immediately places a beer in my hand and we start playing ‘asshole’ with some girls and his good buddy ‘Chewy’ (it’s a drinking game.) I am told there is a keg in the bathroom. Semo suggests I do a keg stand and I am quickly on board. We enter the bathroom and Semo and Chewy hold me upside down while I grip the keg. A girl named Brittney offers to hold the tap in my mouth but I demand my brother does it because “I want this to a be a fucking bonding experience!” Joey is 19 and in his second year of college but apparently has no experience with kegs because he attempts to place the entire tap in my mouth and doesn’t know where the beer comes out of
“Damn it Joey not the whole tap!” I lecture him while being held upside down. Eventually we get things sorted correctly and I do the most pathetically short keg stand of all time, then claim it’s not my fault because I haven’t done one in five years.

We return to the general party and eventually Joey leaves because he is driving and not drinking like a responsible young adult. I stick around with Semo and Chewy and continue to play ‘asshole’ with the girls. After we finish our game things start clearing out and I’m chilling on the couch talking to one of the girls, Sarah (name has been changed), who is rather plain looking but seems very down to earth and chilled out. I am not flirting with her and she is not flirting with me, though she is laughing at my jokes quite a lot. Semo tells me he needs to get out of here with her roommate Brittney, and so Chewy and I walk back to the apartment we’re crashing at together in preparation for waking up at 8am for the Mifflin Street block party.

We’re lying around watching sports and just shooting the shit. I believe it is the second time I’ve ever hung out with Chewy (not the poker playing one) and he is a very full on kind of guy who just says whatever the hell he feels like, a trait we share and point out that we appreciate in each other. I get set up on the couch and he gives me some pillows and blankets to get comfortable with. He’s about to go bed and he blurts
“By the way if you need to jerk it I got some quality lube”
“Yea, might as well. Haven’t in a couple days or something. Thanks for the offer”

I take the bottle and my laptop into the bathroom and fire up some porn. Suddenly my phone beeps and I look down at a text message from Semo that reads:
“Do you want to hook up with Sarah?”
I call him immediately and ask “Wait, what the fuck?”
“Yea man, she was saying she wants to hook up with you. Do you want me to give her your number and she’ll text you?”
“Yea, fuck yea, I got nothing going on. Have her text me. Man that is so random, she didn’t even flirt with me at all.”
Thank God I checked my phone first.

About 10 minutes later I get a text from Sarah asking what I’m up to. I tell her just relaxing at Chewy’s place but not feeling ready for sleep. She says it’s too bad I didn’t stay out longer. I say I can always come back out. She says I should. I say I will then, and then ask where to meet her. She tells me what bar to come to and I say I’ll be there in no time.

I walk outside and am greeted by an enormous scene of fire trucks and flashing lights. Some moron in a white BMW has driven directly into the side wall of the building next to the apartment by the sidewalk I need to walk down. There are police all around and a crowd of people looking on. Good thing I didn’t leave five minutes earlier, that’s the second close call of the evening.

I walk over to the bar at closing time and find Sarah. I greet her with a hug and walk with her and a couple friends back to the apartment where the party was held, which I believe to be Sarah’s place. We hang around drinking for a while and I am instructed to take a shot, which I do but not before I curse everyone out for making me do it. I notice Sarah sending some texts on her phone. About 20 minutes into our little gathering I get a call from Semo
“What the hell is wrong with you dude? Take her home and have sex with her already!”
I guess it’s not her apartment.

About five minutes later I say “Well it’s 3am and we need to be up at 8, I’m heading out. You coming?”
“Yea I’m coming she says”
We step out of the apartment and I turn to her and ask
“Did you text Semo or something?”
“No, why?”
“Ah nothing, he just called before. No worries.”

We walk arm in arm back to her apartment, which eventually turns into her holding my hand. She takes me up to the apartment and we proceed to the bedroom. I sit down on the bed and say “Come here” and we start making out. Making out leads to clothing coming off, which leads to dry humping, which leads to difficulty getting an erection because I have had quite a bit to drink, which eventually leads to erection, which leads to difficulty getting the piece of shit condom Chewy gave me on, which leads to her procuring a better one, which finally leads to sex. I do my best to be good for her, though I’d guess between the alcohol and general exhaustion from being up since 8am I am nothing spectacular. She seems to be enjoying herself though.

When we finish I lay there completely spent for a minute, then ask if I can borrow a toothbrush. Dental hygiene is underrated. She tells me I can. I enter the bathroom and take a look down at myself; the condom has burst wide open. God fucking damn it. I brush my teeth and mouth wash thoroughly. I return to the room and let her know that the condom broke. She does not seem particularly concerned. She goes into the bathroom and it occurs to me that I can’t seem to remember her name. I check my phone for the message Semo sent me. Ah yes, Sarah, that’s right, her name is Sarah.

When we returns we lay around bed draped over each other chatting for a while so I can get to know her a bit
“You don’t have to cuddle me if you don’t want” she says
“Well I’ve got this weird spine thing where I can’t lie on my side without something between my legs. So it’s either your leg or a pillow. What do you prefer?”
“I like having my arms around something.”
“Do you use a pillow too?”
“No I have a teddy bear.”
“Ah, just consider me a much fatter version of a teddy bear then.”
“Hehe, stop it you, you know you’re thin.”

I mostly chat to her about travel, where she’s been and would like to go. I tell her about the various places I’ve been. We agree that a person should travel as much as they can. She seems like a nice girl. We lament the fact that it’s 5am and Semo will be in the room waking us up at 8. Then we drift off into sleep.

Afterword: I have since spoken to Sarah to let her know that I was recently tested and came back clean and to ask whether she’s on the pill. She confirmed that she’s on birth control and also was recently tested. Then we agreed that either can booty call the other whenever we’re around the same city.

April 29th, Milwaukee: I wake up and look at the clock. It’s slightly past 3pm. Man, jet lag can seriously go fuck itself. I throw on some shorts and go for a run around the neighborhood. I intend to use my month in Wisconsin to get back into working out very hardcore.

I return back to the apartment and take a shower. There’s no food in the house so I pack up my computer and walk over to the nearby ‘Subway’ again. When I finish eating I go around the corner to the local coffee shop, set down my bag, and go to the counter to order a coffee. There’s a very cute brunette sitting by herself near the counter studying. I’m standing around waiting for my drink to arrive and suddenly the brunette says to me
“Are you waiting to order?”
“Ah nah, already did. Would be rather rude of them if I were huh?”
“Oh my mistake, never mind then.”
“No worries.”
And then I draw a total blank and just stand there like a fucking moron waiting for my drink. The best looking girl in the place just started talking to me instead of the other way around, and I can’t think of anything to say. What the hell is wrong with me? My drink comes up and I take it over to my seat. I should just slit my wrists right now.

I sit around the café for a couple hours working on my writing. I run into an old professor of mine and spend some time catching up with him. He is a nice guy despite the fact that once during class he’d asked he once asked if someone saw a play that’d been playing in Milwaukee to which I responded
“I did, God I hated it”
“He directed it” said another student with wide eyes in a hushed tone. Foot; meet mouth.

I call my friend Derek because we have plans to hang out today. He tells me to walk over towards his place and we’ll meet half way. I pack up my things and start walking. We meet in front of a convenience store and buy two six packs of quality Wisconsin beer that I can’t get in Australia.

We walk over to his place and crack open a couple beers inside his apartment. We’ve been playing fighting video games together since we were six, something we continue today with ‘Street Fighter 4’. After a few matches he whips out a bag of weed and we fire that shit up. Then we just start talking.

We wind up sitting around his apartment just chatting for over an hour about the thoughts and views we’ve developed over the past few years. At one point he goes on a rant about how ridiculous the economic fallout is, how it’s absurd that anyone trusted people with vastly greater knowledge in the industry to safely invest their money, that it’d be like trying to sit down at the poker table against someone like me as a recreational player. I immediately turn to the computer and show him the blog entry I wrote on the very same subject only a couple weeks ago. I can’t decide if it’s great minds that think alike or just stoned ones.

We go to a local restaurant for dinner. The food is fucking awesome. I tell him that it was a very good decision to go here. He agrees.

After dinner we hang out a little longer at his place, but he has to go to bed early because of work. I take the bus home. When I get there I go upstairs, fire up my computer, and try to finish some writing. It’s only midnight but I feel very tired. I turn the computer off and lay down in bed. I am asleep almost instantly.

April 29th, Milwaukee: I wake up and look at the clock; it reads 3pm. Sounds about right. The apartment is empty as it seems both my friends are at work. I take a shower then sort through my bag for a shirt that isn’t completely wrinkled from having been folded up in my suitcase for so long. I settle for a black one that I assume is too dark to see the wrinkles on without thorough inspection.

I walk over to a local ‘Subway’ for breakfast and get a sandwich. There are free copies of ‘The Onion’ near the entry. I grab one and spend my meal trying not to laugh too hard in the middle of the restaurant. I exit the shop and walk over to the bus station just as a bus pulls out of the stop. I ask the homeless guys chilling there if it was the one I need, and they confirm that it was. Then they return to their discussion of the song ‘Tipsy’, stating that in their day they got a whole hell of a lot more than tipsy in the club.

Eventually another bus comes by and I take the ride into the center of Milwaukee. I get out a block up from my destination; ‘Uhle’s’ cigar shop on Wisconsin Street. When I walk into the store the girl behind the counter, Tamara, is thrilled to see me and gives me a big hug. We’ve known each other for years and even went on a few dates though things never fully clicked, though I suppose we had enough chemistry that she did agree to our first date during a phone call in which she coached me through vomiting into my toilet due to excessive alcohol consumption. Losing heavily at beer pong has its consequences, but that cemented her as one of the coolest chicks ever in my book.

I hang around the store smoking and catching up for a few hours then catch the same bus back to the North East side. I walk over to my friend Cagle’s place and have a long chat to him about what we’ve been up to since we last saw each other two or three years ago. His long term girlfriend cheated on him with some guy 10 years her senior then wound up marrying him. We always told him that’d happen with her, he never listened.

At 7:30 my friend Caitlin picks us up to give us a ride to dinner with my old friend Derek, her boyfriend, riding shotgun with her. I’ve known Derek since I was six and Caitlin since middle school, though I haven’t seen either in a year or two. It’s hard to remember anymore. We meet our friend Erica at an Indian restaurant and spend dinner rehashing old stories and telling some new ones. I shout dinner in exchange for everyone buying me drinks at the bar we’re going to afterwards.

When we finish dinner we head out to Brady Street to have drinks at a local lounge. I am convinced to take a shot. Then I have a beer. Then I am given another shot. Then I am given another beer. Then my friend Vera shows up, a girl I’d had a lot of chemistry with before I left Milwaukee but we got to know each other too late to see if anything could materialize. She had messaged during dinner to ask about having drinks and I told her to meet us out. When she shows up my friends say they need to leave as it is getting late
“I slipped them $20 to do that” I quip to Vera.

They leave and I am alone with Vera. She orders a mixed drink, I get another beer. She’s the kind of clever and witty girl that is incredibly easy and fun to talk to, and I am flirting considerably, which she reciprocates. Then she mentions that she’s dating someone, which I take as a way of telling me to cool it. I tell her my Adelaide tournament story, which afterward prompts her to tell me about how the guy she’s dating has been a completely controlling psycho lately who assumed she had sex with some friend of hers, which she didn’t, and that she questions whether she’ll see him again when he returns from out of town. I take this as a sign to heat it.

She tells me a story about a work colleague who took her out for drinks and tried to make a move. I tell her that she should know that a man will almost never ask a woman out for a one on one encounter and have platonic intentions
“Well I messaged you tonight, and I have platonic intentions” she says
“Yes, but I have absolutely zero platonic intentions with you” I shoot back. She giggles and leans in closer. Our legs are touching.

I’m starting to feel a bit tipsy and suggest that I walk her home because I don’t want to get drunk. The homeless guys would not approve. We exit the bar and I tell her to lock her arm into mine because I don’t have the tolerance for cold I once did.
“It’s a very long walk back to mine” she says
“Well I don’t have anywhere to be and I’m enjoying the conversation”
“Okay, are you hungry? Do you want me to make you some food when we get there?”
“Yea I could eat”
“But you have to promise me you won’t sleep over”
“I promise, besides, you look like a snorer. I’m not down with that. So what do you want your fake name to be when I write about you in my blog?”
“You’re going to write about me?”
“I write about everything interesting that happens to me, and I consider you interesting, though only slightly.”
“Hehe, call me Vera, I’ve always like that name.”
“Vera it is.”

She was not lying; it is a considerable walk back to hers. When we make it back she makes a joke that the security guard will think she’s a huge slut because he’s seen her walking in late at night with the guy she’s dating recently. I love it when girls are self deprecating.

We take the elevator up to her apartment. Inside it has a great view overlooking West Milwaukee. I remark how dead it all looks at this hour. She heats me up a piece of chicken pizza and I tell her I’m also stealing the carrots out of her fridge. I finish my food and tell her to order me a cab. Before I go downstairs I say to her jokingly
“Call me next time you want to hang out as more than friends, cause this platonic shit doesn’t work with you and me, cause ya know next time I’ll make a move, you’ll shoot me down, it’ll be super awkward for everybody involved”
“How do you know? How do you know I’ll shoot you down?”
“Well there’s only one way to find out”
I step towards her, lean in, and kiss her. I do not get shot down.
“Relax, you feel rigid and nervous” she says
“Well maybe that’s cause I’ve been waiting four years to kiss you”
“You’ve been waiting four years to kiss me huh?”
“Well I don’t recall any previous opportunities”
We kiss hard for a moment then I pull back and add
“Actually I’m just nervous about my breath, what with the pizza and all.” She giggles and we stand in her apartment kissing, overlooking half of Milwaukee, a city silent and asleep but for us.
“Okay, enough of your womanly tricks on me, I have a cab to catch.”

I walk to the door; she follows me and gives me a hug. She smells perfect.
“So when are we gonna hang out again?” I ask
“Just call me before you leave town k?”
“I think that can be arranged.”

I arrive in the lobby about 30 seconds before my cab does. I start talking to the driver. He asks how my night’s going. I tell him it’s been pretty good.