I was looking at desktops online and talking to Adanthar when he mentioned the $200 turbo at 5 PM and the $100 satellite to the $1k at 5:30 (both on Full Tilt). I entered them, won the seat into the 1k, so I decided to play poker tonight.
I busted that and the 100k in typical fashion (squeeze with a big pair, run into a bigger one-- yes, in both tournaments). I still had the urge to play, so I sat in at 3/6 NL HU on Cake and waited.
And then I dropped $1800 over the course of 80 minutes. At one table. Most of it to a guy who was cover-your-eyes awful but coolered me three different times. If I don't lose KQ to TT on a 77TKQ board in a reraised pot, or 88 to AA (vs. a guy who instacalled a 4 bet shove with A2o), or JT to K9 on a 99KQ board, then maybe things are different.
I obviously overestimated the importance of that first winning day; as it turns out, that's been my only winning day in the past month. Now, I haven't been playing much at all, but stuff like this is discouraging. I'm trying to rebuild my bankroll, and become a consistent winner, and all the progress I had made on that front has been erased, and then some, in the last month.
Any suggestions would be appreciated. I'm not even sure what games I can beat at this point, since everything I've done up until now can more or less be chalked up to variance.
I think I'm still capable of winning-- and I need to be, what with no other employable skills-- but something has been missing lately.